Thursday, October 06, 2005

the more things change...

Yeah, I'm living in an exotic place. Whooooo! Big fucking deal. There are foreigners (remember, you= foreigner) here who may as well be living in the suburbs of, say Kansas City, which we all know of as hell, right Mr. T?

Point being, you can be anywhere and still be closed off to anything new. I do not count myself as one of them, although I could be more proactive about learning Chinese. I am meeting many new people, foreigners and locals alike. I am wandering around in the city, visiting street markets and strange stores with strange items, or going into temples and watching how people here practice their spirituality. But you know what? If a person chooses to make his or her life adventurous, it is not necessary to go anywhere. We can find adventure in our bathroom if we want. God knows I have.

I see some people here, and have seen them everywhere for that matter, who feel entitled to be entertained, like it's life's fault if their lives are boring as hell. I've done that before. But, for fucksake, life owes us nothing!!! I did not come here to be entertained. I came here to learn about myself, learn things that I could not learn if I was comfortable in a big, American city, where I can, by virtue of speaking the language and earning a decent living, have pretty much everything at my disposal. I want to be challenged. I insist on it.

I could see myself staying here for another year after my initial contract is up, but not in the same school, because that would be too comfortable. I am also flirting, coy little devil that I am, with going to Japan for a job with a business-English firm. That is a good lesson in and of itself, never to burn bridges. I'm still in this owner's good graces after he sent me a job offer from Japan that would have necessitated my leaving Chicago immediately. But we worked it out, and he feels obligated to giving me another opportunity with proper notice sometime.

I'm on my way to a language exchange.


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